On Thursday, March 20, 2025, the Zaona Chapter of Mu Sigma Upsilon Soriority Inc. hosted a Women’s Conference at 9 a.m. in the Multicultural Center.

Keynote Speaker, Lizabeth Purilla, is an Executive Steward at Borgata Hotel Casino and Spa. Purilla joined Borgota in 2003 and now serves as Senior Manager and Executive Steward. She has led teams in Wardrobe, Housekeeping, and Stewarding with expertise in hospitality. Purilla also holds a degree from the University of Lima and Atlantic Cape Community College. Purilla gave a speech that encouraged women in the audience to follow their paths with courage and dignity, never forgetting the importance of not losing oneself in internal struggles.

After Purilla’s speech, the conference saw Shakira J. Willoughby give a presentation: “Finding Your Voice: Unmuted & Unapologetic. “Willoughby is an author, professor, and Associate Director of Digital Learning and Innovation at Rutgers University. She is passionate about the intersection of women’s narratives, identity, and technology.

In her book “Stages of a Woman” is a self-healing poetry book workbook that empowers women to break free from societal expectations and embrace their true journey. Within her presentation, Willoughby highlighted the importance of “owning your space in the digital and professional world.” She had many different activities to help the women in the audience understand who they are and how to truly represent themselves without feeling ashamed or nervous about boasting about their accomplishments and success.

In her presentation, she read a quote that spoke to her “The work me, the outside me, and the home me are three completely different people. We don’t even look the same.” She explained that it spoke so many values to her because she hated going into the workplace questioning “whether if I wanted my hair up or down, whether I should wear sneakers or not.”

Therefore, one of the thoughts that she posed to the audience was “how can you merge all of the versions of you without feeling like you have to be filtered?” She explained when it is okay to take risks in your workplace and how one can show up authentically as themselves but still be professional.

Willoughby’s main goal was to give women the courage to show up as themselves, highlighting the fact that “your journey is uniquely yours.” There is a way for a woman to own her voice everywhere she shows up, and Willoughby gave tips on how to do so, not just in an in-person setting, but also online. She stated, “stop waiting for permission, […] claim space early. […], own your expertise, […] claim your space at the table, […] unmute yourself.”

After the presentation, Kelly Sounthavong, Stockton alumna and sister of the Mu Sigma Upsilon Soriority Inc., navigated the panelist questions and introduced the speakers. The panelists were Jessica Smith, Nafisah Huston, Kellie DeCelis, and Maria Hernandez.

Smith is the Vice President of Facilities at Borgata Resort Casino and Spa, known as a seasoned mechanical engineer and operations leader with over 20 years of experience. Smith has held leadership roles across major companies including Anchor, Renaissance, L’Oréal USA, and many others. She specialized in facility management, processing optimization in team development. Smith is also a graduate of Penn State University.

Huston, also a Sorority Sister in Mu Sigma Upsilon Inc., is known as a seasoned non-profit leader with over a decade of experience in community health. Huston began her career in medical case management supporting individuals living with HIV. Now, she is the C.O.O. of the Non-Profit Organization, Bebashi Transition to Hope, driving operational strategy and program growth to enhance healthcare access for offset communities. Houston is committed to advancing health equity and creating innovative solutions for better care. 

Decelis is known as the first Female Poker Director in Atlantic City History. Leading the renowned poker operations in Borgata, she began her career as a dealer and worked her way up through various roles earning a Dual Bachelor’s degree in Communications and Business Management from Stockton University. DeCelis is passionate about involving the landscape of poker and is dedicated to preserving the game’s essence; instinct, emotion, and energy while embracing innovation. DeCelis’s journey is a testament to leadership, perseverance, and breaking barriers in a traditionally male-dominated industry. 

Hernandez is an Assistant Deputy Public Defender with the New Jersey Office of Public Defender. With a background in Social Work, Hernandez has dedicated her career to advocating for families. Since 2022, she has led the development of OPR Social Work Programs, integrating legal and social services for parents. Previously Hernandez practiced family and special education and worked as a social worker and a family therapist. Hernandez is committed to ensuring families receive the support they need to stay together. 

The first question asked to the panelist was “What are some challenges you faced as a woman in your industry, and how did you overcome them?

Smith answered the question first by stating that one of the challenges she faced was people’s “tendency to judge her because she is a woman in her field.” She explains that since people see her gender first, she is oftentimes looked at as unqualified to be in certain positions that are male-dominated, think that she “doesn’t possess the knowledge to succeed in facility management.”

Smith overcame this stigma by effectively communicating her background and her knowledge to the people who would question her. “I grew up under the head of a car. I have a mechanic background and I have a degree in Mechanical Engineering and it’s not just computer knowledge – it’s hands-on, and I have a respect for electricity.”

Huston stated that as a worker for Non-Profit and Social Services, she worked with a lot of women who she thought would be more supportive and welcoming, but in turn were the opposite. She explained, “I had women that always felt threatened so they would try and box me in and not allow room for growth.” However, by finding her voice, speaking up for herself, talking to mentors, and speaking to others outside the workspace she was in, she overcame that set back.

DeCelis said her biggest challenge was entering the industry in her 20s. “As a 20-something female in the industry I spent every day at work constantly getting questioned about my expertise, my authority and knowledge and it was an incredible challenge.” DeCelis stated that she wanted to give up a lot, but she hunkered down and decided that the way she was going to resolve it was by memorizing the rulebook, or as DeCelis referred to it, her “black-and-white confidence.” Whenever she had to make a ruling at the table she would recite the rule and eventually, she earned the players’ respect and her peers’ respect came naturally.

Hernandez discussed the underrepresentation of women in positions of leadership in Law and Social Work. “Only 20% of woman lawyers are partners in law firms, which is the highest number they have and it’s still an underrepresentation. For minority women the numbers are even lower; only 5% of those women are minorities and 1% are Black and Latina and there are 52% of attorneys in the workforce that are women. So the numbers are very skewed.” Hernandez stated.

“22% of COO’s of Non-Profit or Public Interest Organizations are woman – the higher the budget the less likely it’s going to be a woman running the show. 57% of organizations with a budget of less than one million are run by women. If the budget is higher only 22% are women. And in the social service field, 75% of that particular field is made up of women.” She continued by talking about how pay equity has also been an issue. People say that women are catching up, but Hernandez states that is false. “Understanding that I deserve to be paid equally – I advocate for pay not just for myself but for my staff.” She states that was a big issue when she tried to get staff to work for the government. To add on Hernandez said, “making sure that I understand my role and my position and allowing myself to be in spaces I deserve to be in.” 

Sounthavong then had some follow-up questions for the panelists. The first question was for Huston and her struggles with working with other women within her field. Sounthavong asked, “How do you think think people can change the narrative that it’s not woman against woman?”

Huston answered gracefully by stating she felt like it started to change when she got a new leader at her organization “She came with a different mindset that I wanted to follow,” Huston said, and her leader wanted to “invite her in spaces she has never been and open new opportunities for her.”

Another follow-up question was “As women in your respective fields, did you feel like you had to work ten times harder?” All of the panelists agreed that they did indeed have to put in a little more work and effort to showcase their talents and worth within their fields. 

However, DeCelis stated that this mindset can seem like an attempt to outshine colleagues, when in reality it’s an attempt at showing qualifications. A person needs to be willing to take a step back and reflect on how their actions are affecting others because “the best way to fit in somewhere is understanding how everyone around you feels.”

The next question that was asked was “What advice would you give to young women aspiring to enter your field?” 

Hernandez answered first by highlighting the importance of networking. “When I became a social worker, I knew some social workers. I grew up in Camden, and still live there; from the city, I did not grow up around people that had a lot of money and a lot of resources so that already put me at a disadvantage. Networking and learning are what got me to where I am now. Build a network around you.”

Volunteering is another crucial aspect to success according to Hernandez. “You have to put yourself out there if you’re interested in something – volunteer! It doesn’t have to be eight hours, you can volunteer two or three hours per week if you have time.” She explained that she started off as a social worker, primarily a family therapist, and she loved her job even though main intention become a prosecutor. Even though her career path switched gears, Hernandez said to “never say no to an opportunity because you think that’s not what you want to do and you’re not sure.” 

DeCelis said to “never underestimate what you can do or what your potential is […] You can learn from the people around you or you can learn from your experiences. It’s going to help you succeed.” In general, she said the most important things to do is stay curious and adapt to change, which will help one excel. She ended her answer with the quote, “If you cannot do great things, do small things in a great way.”

Huston added to the discussion by saying that it’s also important to be adaptable. “Things are constantly changing in healthcare by the day so staying informed and not being complacent because at any given moment especially in the Non-Profit sector you have to be willing to pivot,” Huston explained.

Smith, however, really honed in on the idea of hands-on experience. “I’ve worked in nuclear. I’ve inspected parts that go into a nuclear reactor, and if they failed, we’d have a meltdown. I’ve worked in pharmaceuticals, where, if you lose an HVAC unit, you lose millions of dollars of drugs. So everything’s the same. […] So mechanic-wise, the more mechanic knowledge you have and that you can give yourself […] even at home, is what will make you successful in the facilities industry. I need that basis of mechanics, and it starts young.” 

Another question that Sounthavong asked was ““How do you continue to grow and evolve professional skills?” 

Smith answered first by stating it’s all about nuances and learning the different programs that go into running the system and keeping herself abreast of those new facilities, but also learning new industries. “Casinos are new to me, almost three years ago, I didn’t work in hospitality at all, so I’ve always been behind the scenes and having to do with some of the customer-facing. It wasn’t something that I evolved into. So you just have to stay curious and keep learning every opportunity that’s out there.” 

Huston followed up by mentioning different listener networks and going to different conferences and workshops each year, whereas DeCelis stated “when it comes to growth and evolution, you’re never going to stop growing, and you should never want to stop growing.” Both emphasized the importance of attending panels and various networking events, allowing for self-reflection and constructive feedback.

Hernandez piggybacked off of DeCelis’ answer, stating “I will stick by networking, I think that’s the best thing you can do to learn and grow. One of the best things that you can do, is learn from others. It doesn’t end. I learned from my staff, they are the ones that are out in the field doing the direct service with the clients, they’re the ones that I learned from.”

Sounthavong then asked another imperative question: “What changes do you hope for women in your industry for the next five years?”

Hernandez answered “an increase in number of women in leadership positions, to see more women working their way up to the top and pay equity.” DeCelis interjected by saying “I think probably everybody’s answer on this panel would be the same, more women.”

She stated that in 2020, 15% of top executives in the gaming industry were female. Today, that number has doubled, which is phenomenal but there is still work to be done. She also stated that “putting more females in decision-making positions will naturally evolve the poker environment to be more female-friendly. And so, of course, more women in decision-making positions, which will ultimately help grow the market altogether.”

Huston wanted to see more women are a part of research, leading the information that we still utilize because that’s how we can help people. “I think a lot of times, we’re hearing from men telling us about our bodies and our things. So it definitely helps to have more women that we can learn from who’s a part of the things we use and come forward with every day.”

Smith mentions how to her, most things can start at a high school level. “I don’t think a lot of women know what they can do and that these opportunities are out there for them.” However, she notes if they were not introduced to it in high school they wouldn’t know what avenues were for them. “I had an advocate, my father, who taught me from a young age about mechanics and helped direct me in the path that I am on. But I feel that we need to get in front of these girls at a younger age and show them the opportunities that they have, because they can be just as good, if not better, than the men that hold the positions.”

DeCelis and Smith then go into how some of these jobs and careers pay well and how pay equity goes within their initial fields. With this, Sounthavong asked thequestion: “How did you guys find out about your pay and how did you navigate the discrepencies of your pay.”

Maria answered first: “I googled it because our salaries are online. I work for the state. Our salaries are online. I know who makes what. But also, just speaking to other people, I think people hide their salary. They don’t want to talk about how much money they make or how much money they don’t make. I’m open to it. It is what it is, but I also, when you I did a research for this, you can see the numbers. You can see the disparities out there, and it’s obvious.”

DeCelis was transparent with her answer and stated: “In my field, I have not experienced any pay discrepancies at all. I understand they exist, but the foundation that I started was a dealer, and we worked for tips, and so as a woman, I was probably making more of them, I know, but you know everybody in my company, at least when you move into a supervisory role, everybody starts at the same number. Everybody gets the same AGI increase every year, and we are very open and happy to promote based on diversity but so luckily for me, I have not encountered paid discrepancies that I’ve had to look.”

Huston recommended learning through conversation and research, “but mostly through conversation, when you hear what other people make and when it’s posted because you can look it up online.”

Agreeing with DeCelis, Smith mentions that because their company is really good with it, they have designated pay bands. “it doesn’t matter if you’re a female or a male, if you’re in the band, they’re very fair.” 

Furthermore, the panelists then answered: “How do you handle a high-pressure situation in a customer environment?”

Smith stated that her team typically works behind the scenes, with their “primary focus [being to] always make the guests happy when issues arise.” However, they have a plethora of guidelines in the department to follow that help us through

Huston, in the medical field, learned how to to de-escalate, or calm the person down with deep breaths. Here, training is essential in order to learn how to help under pressure.

DeCelis stated how women need to be “overly cognizant of maintaining control over our emotions and, you know, keeping focus being able to handle things with a positive professional demeanor.” With her team, she uses the terms “assess and address” in order to assess the situation and then address it. They follow an initiative at MGM entitled “Say Yes,” which asks DeCelis and her team to invent creative solutions for a strong, empathetic environment for the guests. “Ultimately,” DeCelis said, “I think handling high-pressure situations, especially in a customer-driven environment, requires that not only you be able to manage a single situation, but that you prepare your whole team to be able to manage any situation, as long as the customer experience is a top priority.”

Hernandez, working in a client-oriented field, said that “everything is about the client, from the legal standpoint and from the social work standpoint.” They also have to take into consideration not just the client, but the courts, service providers, the child welfare system all coming out at once. She highlighted the importance of duality and urgency while staying effective and having boundaries. “Boundaries are one of the most important things you can have in the social work field,” Hernandez explained, because it’s the best way to protect yourself from burning out.”

The final question during this panel was “As a woman in your field, what is a reality check you came across and how did you handle it?” 

Hernandez answered, “I realized that as a woman, especially as a minority woman in the legal field, I was not taken seriously.” There were times when she would walk into court and people would ask if she was the client, when in reality, she was there representing the clients. “This can definitely lead to imposter syndrome and doubting your own self and that was a big reality check for me,” she explained.

She went on to say that she manages a state-wide program and she’s “in every single county in the state of New Jersey, I had to work my way up to where I’m at and people would ask me ‘who’s your boss,’ I’d respond ‘I am the boss.'” Having confidence is essential to Hernandez, as well as acknowledging the work it took to progress in her field.

DeCelis then continued the conversation by saying that “Coming into your career is going to primarily be about work and improving yourself, and eventually you are going to get into a level when you realize you cannot do it alone.” Delegation and the ability to delegate the right task to the right people is one of the most important pieces to success, as well as not being afraid to ask for help.

Huston said that for her, realizing you can’t say the same things a man could was tough. An example she gave was with a funder she encountered: “They were doing something incorrect and so I thought, I’m just going to say it – I’m going to speak my mind. That did not go so well.”

Huston explained that it doesn’t matter how far a woman can go; she will always have to watch her tone and how she says certain words while still find a way to be herself. “And I am still working on that and learning that,” Huston said, “but overall, figuring out how to say certain things in a certain way where it’s respectful but you are still getting your point across and you are still being heard.”

Smith then ends off by saying that “some men just don’t like to report to females.” At the end of the day, the job still needs to be done, whether people report back or not. She realized she can’t get everyone to like her, but she has to keep moving forward.

After this session, Sounthavong left the opportunity for the audience to ask any questions to the panelists that might’ve been missed during the initial Q&A.

There are times when women are overqualified in certain positions, but they find themselves backing down and experiencing imposter syndrome because they feel like they can’t assert their presence in a male-dominated field. The conference as a whole encouraged women to go against these fears, know their worth, and to not be afraid to take up space when permitted.